Weekly HOMILY for May 17, 2009: Our Desire for God

6th Sunday of Easter, Cycle B
Our Lady of Grace
May 17, 2009

Our Desire for God
By (Rev. Msgr.) Nicholas P. Amato


Love Through an Icon

This past week I spent two days praying with icons. It was part of my preparation to one day become a Director of Contemplative Retreats.

Using perhaps the oldest and most famous icon from the dome of Hagia Sophia in Istanbul, I was able to see through the icon, as if through a window, to the Jesus behind its eyes.

At times it was I looking through the icon’s eyes to the Lord and at other times it was the Lord looking out the icon’s eyes to me.

And for long periods of time I was able to feel my love for Jesus and his for me. There was a tremendous bonding and feeling of unity between us. It was extraordinary.


Desire to Be Desired

Today’s scripture is full of a similar love. God wants to be loved; Jesus wants to be loved; everybody wants to be loved.

One theologian has said that the essence of being human is the desire to be desired by the one we desire.

We desire all kinds of things from birth to death. We begin desiring a breast, and end, as the poet says, “By desiring ease from suffering and finally the freedom to die.”

And along the way, we desire health, safety, success, money, fame and everything we can imagine.


The Desire of Another Person

But beneath and above and beyond all of our desires is the desire for another person.

We don’t have to prove that – it’s buried deep within our bones and we know when it happens.

We immediately recognize that we desire a person in a different way from how we desire other things like chocolate or a glass of wine, or success for ourselves.

We desire a person for her own sake, not for our sake. We desire him not as a possession, but as a partner.

But that is only the first part of desire. In the very act of desiring another person, we also desire that they desire us.

Our desiring makes them valuable; their desiring makes us valuable.


Desire Less Than Perfect

But even when desire is answered, it is less than perfect. Your desire wanes, their desire gets distracted, but desires are wayward.

No one can ever meet our needs, match our wants, complete our desires. We always desire more; if we didn’t what would God be for?

That’s how my gazing at the icon became such a wonderful experience: I could see God as he is and God could see me as I am. He is reaching out to me and I to him.

So through grace and the window of an icon of Jesus, I could discover that there is a God who is all that I can ever desire.

What a joy it is to know that our desires are not futile or evil!


Desired by the One we Desire

But that is only our first desire. We now desire to be desired by the One we desire.

But how can a perfect Being who created me actually desire me?

That would mean that God cares about me, live for me, loves me.

Of course, that is precisely the Good News: that God first desires us, and then enables us to desire God back.

But why doesn’t it feel that way? Why are we not as emotional about God as we are about our human loves? It’s because we split our single act of loving into two compartments.

We elevate loving God to another sphere; we spiritualize God’s love; we de-humanize God’s love.

We have to keep our love on a single continuum. We have to understand that our desire for Oreo cookies is a piece of our desire for God; that our desire for peace is a taste of diving shalom; that our desire for another person is a participation in our desire for God.


Conclusion

Every desire leads to God.

Each of us is essentially a living, throbbing desire to be desired by the God we desire.